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5 things harder than getting into Harvard

Apr 08, 2022

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Universities are reporting record-low acceptance rates across the board this spring, and Ivy League schools are no exception. At the top of the heap, Harvard just announced it accepted 3.19% of its applicants for the class of 2026, a record low for the Crimson Ivy amid record-high applicants. But in the real world, lots of jobs are even harder to get than getting into Harvard. Here are some of the most competitive opportunities in this week’s Five For Friday.

#1: Goldman Sachs summer internship

A record-breaking 236,000 college students applied for a 2022 summer internship at Goldman Sachs, with just 3,500 gaining admittance. Not surprisingly, this ambitious 1.5% haven’t been scared off by the barrage of complaints from overworked analysts, with some citing 95-hour work weeks. While it might be a rough summer for these future Gordon Geckos, the prorated $85,000 annual salary for the 10-week gig should cushion the blow.

#2: Secret Service agent

According to The Infographics Show on YouTube, fewer than 1% of those who apply to become a Secret Service agent actually make the cut. If your desire in life is to protect the president, you’ll need to first pass a rigorous background check, obtain top-secret clearance and take a polygraph — and that’s just to get into Secret Service bootcamp.

#3: Delta flight attendant

Landing a gig as a Delta flight attendant can be turbulent. Fewer than 1% are accepted after a very thorough interview process, but that’s just the start. Future flight attendants will go through months of training and testing covering swimming, self defense, and of course, the ability to stand on one’s feet for the long haul. 

#2: Tesla job

A very small 0.5% of job applicants at the electric vehicle firm will actually end up working for Elon Musk. That’s 2,500 people out of a pool of more than 500,000 applicants. Some have taken to Twitter to announce their rejections, which is kind of meta considering Musk is Twitter’s newest board member.

#1: Major League Soccer player

Most high school senior soccer players with major league dreams will be sorely disappointed. Only 0.09% of high school senior boys playing interscholastic soccer will eventually be drafted by a Major League Soccer team, or one in 1,000. Former boys soccer star Ousseni Bouda is that “one,” and getting there wasn’t easy. Growing up playing junior soccer in Ghana, Bouda made his way to the U.S. to play ball at a New York prep school before being recruited to Stanford University. The San Jose Earthquakes drafted him eighth overall in the 2022 MLS SuperDraft this year.

Student: i got into harvard oh my god i got into harvard

Simone Del Rosario: it’s college admission season and seniors everywhere are anxiously checking their emails.  harvard just accepted a record-low 3.2% of its applicants for this fall.  

Legally Blonde Movie Clip: you got into harvard law? What like it’s hard?

Simone Del Rosario: Actually elle – there are a lot of things harder than getting into harvard. we’ve got ‘em in this week’s five for friday.  in fifth place, a record breaking 236,000 college students applied for a summer internship at goldman sachs leading twitter to ask what labor shortage? at a 1.5% acceptance rate the 3500 future gordon geckos apparently aren’t put off by the barrage of complaints from overworked analysts. might be a rough summer for these interns, but the prorated $85,000 annual salary for the 10 week- gig should cushion to blows.  in the fourth spot, a government job! according to the infographics show, less than 1% of those who apply become a secret service agent. if your desire in life is to protect the president, you’ll need to pass a rigorous background check, obtain top-secret clearance and take a polygraph – and that’s just to get into secret service bootcamp.  coming in at number three, it’s not so much a job, but a lifestyle.  landing a gig as a delta flight attendant can be turbulent. less than one percent get accepted round after round, and then you have to go through months of training before taking to the skies. the full battery of tests include swimming, self defense, and of course, the ability to stand on one’s feet for the long haul is a must. in second position, tesla. a very small half percent of job applicants at the ev firm will actually end up working for elon musk – that’s 2500 people from a pool over 500,000 applicants. some have taken to twitter to announce their rejections, which is kinda meta if you consider the social company’s new board member.  and in the top spot this week is u.s. men’s premier soccer. a miniscule .09 percent of high school senior boys playing interscholastic soccer will eventually be drafted by an mls team. that’s around 1 in a thousand. former boys socccer star ousseni bouda (ooh – say – knee  buddha) is that one, but with moves like these in high school you can see why. now that’s someone who really beat the odds. not to mention he made it through stanford before getting drafted – which is…almost as hard as getting into harvard. i’m just glad i made it through the week! that’s your five for friday for just business i’m simone del rosario see you monday.